So I've been meaning to write on this topic for a long time but always sorta kinda you know felt reluctant, but today I just had to let it out. In a way I feel like I've been called to reach out to teenagers especially high school age but I keep giving God one excuse or the other, but today it was a no no. Its already 12:55am and the Lord keep saying I won't let you sleep till you write this. Mind you I just finish my exams and moving out of the dorm so I'm more than exhausted, so as God's will here I'm writing this post. For anyone that might be offended by anything I say on here please accept my apologies in advance and know that I have no intent to hurt any feelings.
Let's talk about sex!...Oh yeah you read that right the "S" word. To me I feel like this topic is a taboo in some cultures and even in the African communities in America where everything in the media is pretty much about sex.
I was moved to post this when I had a mini high school reunion with about six ladies last weekend. I will not necesarily call it a reunion because we all go to the same university but with each of us in totally different field we barely see each other and after almost 4 years it was definitely time to catch up.
After a long week, all I wanted to do was sleep in on Friday but somehow I still managed to go to the get together. When I got there first thing I saw was the girls had already gone shopping and was ready to get cooking which I was excited for since I love to cook. We all greated each other and all that since some of us has not seen each other in months . After that one of the ladies let's call her minister came up to me all smiling and bashing her eyelashes,
Minister: So Mz YSU how are you? I miss you
YSU: um I'm good, I've been around since you don't return my call
Minister: Gurl I'm sorry you know how it is....
Minister: So YSU can I ask you a question?
YSU: SHOOT!
Ms. Minister went on smiling, talking softly, bashing eyelashes, saying you know its a personal question and I've never asked you before and I don't know how you will feel about it, yadi yadi yada...10 Minuetes later minister turn to one of the other girl ms ohsocute can you please ask the question for me? Ms. Ohsocute turn to Ms. Honest and said can you ask her for me? At this point Mz Yellow sisi was already turning all red trying to figure out what this "QUESTION" was that nobody wanted to ask....5 minutes later Ms. Honest still did not ask so Ms. Minister finally let the question out "Are you a virgin?"
Funniest thing was before Minister even finish her question I had already screamed out my yes. It was as if she was asking "what is your name" and because you know it you just scream it out. Anyway It was after I answered that I realize the question she had ask me. Initially I had no facial reaction but after I thought about it, my question was "is that it?, was that the question every body did not want to ask?
Minister: Yeah, cuz we thought it might be very personal
YSU: umm OK
Now to me I did not see what the big deal was about this question, It is something that I'm proud of and definitely do not mind sharing it. Now if you had seen the ladies faces it was as if it was a huge crime and a big taboo. It sad that because sex sell some girls feel like it's a taboo to be a virgin and others say things like "girl you are so old school" or "girl you are missing out on some good fun" Honestly who cares? If it ain't for the hubby why should it be fun?
Now sex is one topic that mother and I never talked about in my early teen, all that was said was it was bad for you and boys are bad for you. This is common among many youth and therefore they are left with no other options than to learn from the media, their mates or even experiment on their own.
So is Sex a good thing?
Personally I'd say sex is a beautiful thing created by God for a man and his wife. Now looking at it from the Bible side, God created all things that were good and therefore sex is a good thing...After His creation, he said unto them be fruitful and multiply. remember a man and his wife not any man and any woman.
Genesis 1: 27-28 – “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. God blessed them and said to them, "Be fruitful and increase in number;
Premarital Sex?
I'm not in the position to say what is right or wrong but I must say that the society we live on today have become very relax about sex talk and all that so we are made to believe that it is ok before marriage but the Bible tells us otherwise, It is part of our duty to learn to control ourselves.
1 Thessalonians 4:3-4 – “It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable
Also Hebrews 13:4 tells me that marriage should be honored and the marital bed kept pure. Now that implies weather you are single or not that bed belongs to someone and until you are with that someone it should not be defiled. While I was studying sha I found this verse and I kinda sorta like it :) so all the married folks I hope y'all are doing your duties. The verse is
1 Corinthians 7:2-3 – “But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.”
But it's so tempting!
Off course na its not easy, I can testify to that been twenty-something years and still holding back, there's been times I just want to say "I love him so much" or "Just this one Lord" and I hear "NO!" Now been the human that we are temptation are to come our ways weather we like it or not but however it is the given in that makes it a sin.
I had a perfect bible verse for this part but I've been searching for it in my bible and can't find it so I gave up but the verse goes something along the line of "There is no temptation that is above you, and God is faithful and will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear" (I really wish I could find this). My point is hang in there even if you are tempted.
What if I've already done it?
If you have not sin raise up your hand. My point is we have all sin one way or the other and if yours is through sex well it is not too late to be made whole again, God is an ever forgiven God. The moment we acknowledge that we were wrong and ask for forgiveness and the strenght not to do it again He will surely forgive. Now in addition to God forgiving you and I, we must also learn to forgive ourselves no matter how much the devil will try to remind you of it, look him in the face and tell him "I'm a new creation and I'm forgiven" see ACT 13:38 regarding forgiveness.
*exhale* Now that it's all said and done (quiet long huh?), I'm so sleepy and therefore refuse to go back and proof read
Blessings
Mz. YSU
